I'm a loser, baby...
Friday, March 17, 2006
I could have gone out for St. Patrick's day. The husband wasn't planning on going out, the girlfriends were raring to go, and I had nothing else going...but I chose not to go. I am officially old.
I await the public flogging from my readership for turning down a golden opportunity for a drinking story. I have certainly failed you. The shame I feel is truly a weight around my neck, but flog me if you must.
I also await an ass-whipping from the fashion police for wearing this shirt to school today:
In my defense, there is enormous peer pressure to wear green on St. Patrick's Day in an elementary school. There was not a single teacher who forgot to wear her green, and if I hadn't, I would have been questioned by every staff member that I happened to cross paths with. I also would have been ridiculed by hundreds of small children in succession.
I had planned to wear a green sweater [a more muted color of green...my selection of green clothing is extremely limited], but found out Thursday that I had a job interview for some open positions in the school district for next year, so I headed out at the last minute last night to find something interview-appropriate. This was all I could find on the fly.
It is a sleeveless, solid green shell with a filmy overshirt that has three quarter sleeves and embroidery. It could have been worse, I suppose...it SCREAMED teacher, and was quite a hit with the over-40 set that I work with. The funny part was when I mentioned that I was thinking of going out tonight, and Mrs. D decided to chime in.
Mrs. D: "Well, you're all dressed up already!"
K: "I can't wear this to go out."
Mrs. D: [confused] "Why not?"
K: "I'd be going out with my single girlfriends."
Mrs. D: [still confused]
K: "I'd have to wear something with a bit more cleavage to keep up with them."
Mrs. D: [mouth hangs open]
K: [backpedals] "Well...not a LOT of cleavage."
Mrs. D: "Isn't it a bit cold out for that?"
K: "It's never too cold for cleavage when you're hunting for a man."
Mrs. D: [mouth hangs open again]
K: [SHIT!] "Oh, well I'M clearly not hunting. But you know how it is..."
I wish I could go a day without my mouth getting me into trouble.
I await the public flogging from my readership for turning down a golden opportunity for a drinking story. I have certainly failed you. The shame I feel is truly a weight around my neck, but flog me if you must.
I also await an ass-whipping from the fashion police for wearing this shirt to school today:
In my defense, there is enormous peer pressure to wear green on St. Patrick's Day in an elementary school. There was not a single teacher who forgot to wear her green, and if I hadn't, I would have been questioned by every staff member that I happened to cross paths with. I also would have been ridiculed by hundreds of small children in succession.
I had planned to wear a green sweater [a more muted color of green...my selection of green clothing is extremely limited], but found out Thursday that I had a job interview for some open positions in the school district for next year, so I headed out at the last minute last night to find something interview-appropriate. This was all I could find on the fly.
It is a sleeveless, solid green shell with a filmy overshirt that has three quarter sleeves and embroidery. It could have been worse, I suppose...it SCREAMED teacher, and was quite a hit with the over-40 set that I work with. The funny part was when I mentioned that I was thinking of going out tonight, and Mrs. D decided to chime in.
Mrs. D: "Well, you're all dressed up already!"
K: "I can't wear this to go out."
Mrs. D: [confused] "Why not?"
K: "I'd be going out with my single girlfriends."
Mrs. D: [still confused]
K: "I'd have to wear something with a bit more cleavage to keep up with them."
Mrs. D: [mouth hangs open]
K: [backpedals] "Well...not a LOT of cleavage."
Mrs. D: "Isn't it a bit cold out for that?"
K: "It's never too cold for cleavage when you're hunting for a man."
Mrs. D: [mouth hangs open again]
K: [SHIT!] "Oh, well I'M clearly not hunting. But you know how it is..."
I wish I could go a day without my mouth getting me into trouble.
sKWeez'd by K @ 7:46 PM | Perma-link
3 Comments:
At 3/17/2006 8:39 PM,
Stephanie said…
I join you my dear as a official couch potatoe for the evening! But all I have as an excuse is that I could'nt find a sitter.... O Well always next year!
Enjoy! Steph
At 3/17/2006 9:01 PM,
Washington Crunchy Mama said…
Hah, it must be a riot to work with you. I'd just follow you around to watch the mouths drop open and laugh my ass off.
I'm at home too, waiting to pick up the teenager and her friend from their dance. Ah age. Lovely.
At 3/17/2006 9:35 PM,
K said…
I'm probably one of the more scandalous types, that's for sure...you wouldn't believe how hard it is to stifle the potty mouth for 8 hours a day. The little bit that slips out here and there is enough to send the tongues wagging.
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