If you care enough to give the very best...

...then meet the YVA Gold.



"YVA is the essence of fashionable and deeply vibrating pleasure couture. Made from sterling silver and handmade in 18 K gold-plate, it is rechargeable, splash proof and extremely quiet. (this is a special order item, please let us know if there is a date deadline for delivery) Comes included with wooden gift box, universal charger, introduction manual, moleskin carry pouch and a 1-year LELO warranty. "


I know...I'm just as excited as you are, and whipping out my American Express Black as we speak...but before we start burning up the plastic, let's go over the details, shall we?

Key features:

Rechargeable

Hell YES! I just hate wasting Alkaline D batteries every 3 months or so. Cost effective AND environmentally friendly? Shit, it will pay for itself! [in about 300 years]

Up to 7 hours of continuous use (after 1-2 charging)

I want to meet the woman who could handle 7 hours of direct clitoral stimulation. Really, I do.

Holds charge for up to 90 days

Are you kidding? If I paid $1500 for a sex toy, I'd be all up on that shit daily...maybe even several times a day. In my house, YVA Gold would certainly earn its keep.

Can be "locked" like a mobile phone

Why would you need to lock it? Doesn't everyone keep their toys in a box that is stuffed under the bed anyway? Or is this so if the YVA Gold is kidnapped, that the thief will be unable to enjoy it?

Very quiet

It better be. Shit, it better walk over to the bed, lube itself up and dive under the covers too for $1500 clams.

Splashproof

... but not waterproof. Hmm. This must be to put the squirters' minds at ease.

One year warranty

One fuckin' year? That's IT? I want a shirtless, hard-bodied man oiled up and instantly at my door if the YVA gold fucks up, for the rest of my life, to fix the little bastard.

I can't imagine who buys these. Hell, in some countries, you can buy a man outright for that price.