It's official! I'm a heathen.

According to yesterday's comment from "anonymous", I'm a Godless shell of a person who is probably going to burn in hell.

Well ok. Since I'm already damned, I might as well cross a few things off my "list of things to do before I go to hell".

K's List of Things To Do Before Going to Hell

• Have an orgy. Shit, have two. Or three.
  

• Loot. The Coach store is begging for a good old fashioned lootin', and I'm just the hellbound bitch to give it to them.

• Moon as many people as possible. I've been sparing the world the sight of my oversized and Casper-white ass because I was afraid of losing points with the Almighty, but thanks to "anonymous", I know that I don't have to worry about that anymore!

• Public intoxication. Someone get me a bottle of vodka and a bagful of whatever illegal substance is available, QUICK! Screw clean livin', I'm going to hell now!

• Tell everyone who ever screwed me over to KISS MY ASS. I'm going door to door, fuckers. I was all about "forgive and forget", but seeing as that policy hasn't gotten me any closer to the pearly gates, all you bastards are fair game. Add to this "peeing on the hoods of their cars" and "taking a shit on their lawns" once I'm done verbally berrating them.
  

• Demand refunds for my charitable contributions. All those paper sneakers I filled out for the Children's Hospital and Jerry's Kids, contributions to the church...well, I want them back! You SOB's are on your own. I will also be collecting any bit of spare change I ever threw into a "Save the [blank]" bucket, I'm going to need it to pay off the whores that will be stopping by later for the orgy.

Hell is hot, and it's forever, so I might as well try to build up some brownie points with the Big Red Man himself so I can at least get a room with a view of the flowing molten lava.



WHO'S WITH ME??? There's plenty of room in my bobsled, but remember: grass, cash or ass, nobody rides for free. Freebies are for the GOD FEARING FOLK, not for us!